Countin’ the days to Avery


Our lil’ Peanut could get here any day now, at 37 weeks she’s considered full term. I read a little factoid yesterday that said 95% of all births occur 2 weeks before or 2 weeks after the official due date….Her due date is October 31st.

I ain’t even gonna lie, Grammy is scared shitless. There….I’ve said it. I feel ill prepared….

I’m completely ready to be The Grammy, to welcome her and completely surrender myself to worshipping at her teensy little chubby feet. It’s the getting her here that has my stomach in knots.

I’ve given birth twice, both times completely naturally. I know how all that works. However I’ve never been on this side of the birthing table….I honestly think I prefer being with the one with her legs in the stirrups, at least then I knew what my job was…Grunt. Push. Holler. splloooosh splopppp…BABY!  My role was clearly defined. Now?? Not so much…

My Mom drove me nuts when I was in labor…the fussing, the “oh my poor baby-s”,  the fretting, the wringing of hands….nobody needs that when they’re trying to expel another human from their body. I had to make my poor Brother wrangle her out into the waiting room and hold her down in there til it was over.  I don’t want to be that Mom…

Britt wants me in the delivery room with her. So do I hold her hand, not hold her hand?? Watch what’s going on down there or focus on her head?? Coach? Cheer? How much is too much? How much is not enough?? She’s not going to know what she needs, she’s a rookie. I’m supposed to be the experienced one! Do I go all Shirley MacLain from “Terms of Endearment” on the staff’s asses or let them do their job?? Who knows best, me or them?? Auuuughhhhhhh!

Help me.

And what if, God forbid, there are complications? Stay with my child, or stay with her child?? Who needs me more, the Momma or the Baby??

I need a friggin’ manual. Seriously. Does anybody know of one??

I googled ways to be supportive in the labor/delivery room (all aimed at the Dad to be) and my “Grammy” hospital bag is packed with the recommended items and already in the truck…I was thrilled *insert eye roll* to read one thing recommended repeatedly; “don’t let your Mother-in-law in the room”….that crap better not apply to Mama’s too! I was invited dammit…I reckon I’m as ready as I can be…

I hate feeling helpless.


Top 10 things I want to do with Peanut, plus 11 more…

I’ve been thinking about Avery’s (aka Peanut aka Fatty McChubChub aka my about-to-be-born-any-day Granddaughter)  future a lot lately with her arrival time getting closer and closer….Not practical things like how much am I going to put in her savings account every payday for her college education, or teaching her baby sign language or how often to flash Baby Einstein cards at her. Nahhhh, nothing like that, just fun ways to spent time together!

Here’s what I’ve come up with so far:

1. She’s getting a camera when she’s like 3, so she can learn to take pictures of bugs and weeds and rocks…

2. I’m taking her hiking. Even when she’s itty bitty….

3. Spend nice Sunday afternoons at Storybook Island.

4. Bake Poppa cookies in matching aprons like these while we sing along to my ipod, loudly and off key…and dance. Gotta do the happy baking dance, cookies just don’t turn out as well without the dance

5. Plant flowers, ’cause playing in the dirt is fun for Grammys too!

6. Teach her to ride a 4-wheeler. Ok, technically this will be Poppa’s job but I’ll be there to take pictures of them while it’s happening! And then take her 4-wheeling in the hills, preferably when it’s muddy! (see #5 above)

7. Have movie junk food days when the weather is icky. Lotsa classic Disney, lotsa gummy bears, teddy grahams, homemade chex mix and ice cream sundaes with extra sprinkles!

8. Make spaghetti because I’m sorry, spaghetti covered little faces are just a photo op waiting to happen!

9. Make mosaic stepping stones for the garden, and let her put as many marbles, rocks, and hand prints on them as she wants…

10. Paint Christmas ornaments for the family, because the ones my girls made with their Granny every year are still my favorite ornaments on the tree.

11. Read. and read. and read….sitting with her in my lap while we read “The Pokey Little Puppy” for the 100th time sounds like heaven. 🙂

12. Skype with Auntie Vivi and Uncle Dan so they never feel like they’re missing out, and neither will she…

13. Finger Paint. I plan to buy those mongo rolls of paper like they have in Elementary schools so she can roll out 10 feet of it to paint a mural masterpiece if she wants to!

14. Talk. Listen. The first for her, the second for me. About whatever is on her little mind….

15. Blow bubbles while she dances and giggles trying to catch them! There will be gallons of bubble juice at Grammy’s house….

16. Snuggle on the couch with our matching pillowpets and take naps. (yes, I’ve already purchased her pillowpet that matches mine, wha??? They’re comfy!) Or just snuggle….it’s all good!

17. Watch her Poppa teach her how to fly fish…

18. Get dressed up and go for Grammy/Granddaughter mani-pedis and then somewhere fancy for lunch.

19. Let her fix my hair and makeup as much as she wants, and put as many clips and barretts in my hair as she possibly can!

20. Teach her how to take care of a puppy. Peanut needs a puppy, I’m thinking a Bassett….

21. Let her make her own list of things she wants to do with me….