My Toddler speak is rusty…

Peanut babbles/jabbers all. the. time….

About 1 sound in 562,265,566 is understandable…she mostly communications her needs/wants/wishes through a series of complicated grunts, whines and hand gestures which are sometimes accompanied by the stomping of her little feet….

Here’s the list of oft-spoken words and phrases discernible to grown up ears:

  1. NO.
  2. STOP.
  3. DON’T.
  4. Uh-uh
  5. Thank You
  6. Night Night
  7. Hi!
  8. Ow! (also sometimes Wow!)

This morning after asking/telling her repeatedly to get out from behind my couch (a suggestion she was FIRMLY opposed to), I was forced to physically remove her from behind said couch and put her in a 30 second time-out to which she very distinctly said “NOT NICE”….

I’d like to think she was acknowledging her own misbehavior but I’m realistically inclined to believe her newly coined phrase was her expressing her opinion of the imposed punishment…

I can’t prove it, but the other day I’m fairly certain our budding wordsmith uttered the phrase “F*ck off”….I supposed it could just as easily have been “Television” or maybe “Juice”…

I no longer speak Toddler…

I tried to find a tutorial online. Seriously, I Googled “Interpreting Toddler Speak” and “How to understand baby talk” and many variations thereof….The interwebs are as clueless on this subject as I am.


And so, I’ll continue my attempts to decipher her wants through a complicated and time consuming  process of elimination:

Peanut (standing in the middle of the kitchen, pointing in several directions simultaneously): “Aahneebabanish”

Gram: “Do you want a drink?”

Peanut: “NO!”

Gram: “Are you hungry?

Peanut (Volume increasing radically, and stomping from one foot to the other): “NONONO!” (jabbing chubby forefinger for emphasis)

Gram: (Going to refrigerator, desperation creeping into voice) “Do you want juice?” “Milk??”


Gram: “Cookie??” “Raisins??” “Cash????” “Do you want to go Night Night??”

Peanut (Moving to a cabinet, up on tippy toes, attempting to open a drawer) AAAAAWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!”

Gram (Opening the drawer, lifting Baby up to see in it) WHA???”

Peanut (Reaching into drawer to retrieve a refrigerator magnet she stashed in there weeks ago): “Thank You” (Making happy baby noises and grinning from ear to ear)

Gram: “OY”

Someone needs to publish a Toddler to English translation book….

Peanut finger


A letter to my Granddaughter…

Dear Peanut/Peanut Butter Baby/Nutter Butter/Nutters/Knot Head,

I heart you…

No really, I do. A whole big bunch. Like to the moon and back. Like to infinity X infinity….

I want to thank you for being so good on our road trip. Cuz you were very, VERY, wonderfully, outstandingly, tremendously GOOD. Like, so good I couldn’t believe it. Everyone said so, it’s not just Gram being all biased and stuff…

Take for instance, the Graduation ceremony…in the High School gym, the one with no air conditioning. The one with no AC on a evening it was 90 degrees with 99% humidity outside. The one who was jam packed with sweaty folks who’s deodorant was failing in the sweltering heat…You just took turns sitting on my lap or Poppa’s, calmly taking in all the Pomp and Circumstance and smell of B.O…Not a whimper or a whine came from you (as opposed to myself) even though you’d woken up that morning with a fever and were all congested and had a nasty cough. We all knew you didn’t feel good, but you came through like a CHAMP….for that alone you deserve a pony…

When you fell asleep halfway between the School and the following party for your graduating cousin, Poppa and I knew that waking you up to be passed around amongst all the family who would be attending the party was not an option and so we skipped it, carried you carefully into the hotel room and let you sleep, cuz you deserved it….

You made it up to the family the next day by giggling that deep, husky giggle of yours when you played and giving everyone lots of smiles and a few hugs…In short, you charmed the pants off them and now they all know why we’re so crazy about you…They get it.

Little Charmer…



12 bucks well spent….

Vivi and I found a prize for Peanut on our recent thrift store adventure…


From the moment she spied it in her little play space at Grammy’s house, she approved of our find!


Like, SERIOUSLY approved…IMG_2608

As in, couldn’t get her out of it when it was time for her to go home…


I think this summer I’ll take it outside and let her cook up some rocks and dirt…

Gravel Souffle’ anyone?

Twig Stew?

Grass Gumbo?

Mulch Cookies with Dirt Sprinkles??

Peanut’s Fresco Cafe  is open for business!