Whimper, Whine and Sob…

On Tuesday I decided to repaint our front porch.

On Wednesday I got 3/4 of the porch painted and then my knee went out when I knelt on it.

On Thursday I whimpered, whined and sobbed because I still can’t put any weight on it.

Today I’m just gonna be flat out pitiful.

I had a massage (for my back) scheduled for this morning but before I can even think about driving myself I need my knee brace which I can’t find. I’m pretty sure it’s downstairs in a box but I can’t effin make it downstairs without the brace.  I TRIED. So late yesterday afternoon I cancelled my appointment.

The other day someone posted this random status; “Needy is such an unattractive trait”. WELL I’M NEEDY. Also unattractive apparently. Sue me.

I shouldn’t whine about my knee, it’s not my territory. My friend Bubbe and I have this arrangement worked out, I called dibs on all back related whimpering and she laid claim to defective knees (she’s just recovering from major, major, MAJOR knee surgery). Nevertheless here I am, crutching all over her territory….

I hate having to use crutches….

When I was like 12 my BFF Annie had a dirt bike and very indulgent parents. I spent every weekend I could at Annie’s house. My Mom FORBID me to go anywhere near that bike. F.O.R.B.I.D. So of course I had to try and ride it. Duh…..Consequently, I crashed and burned and banged up my knee. I never told my Mother. I also made poor Annie pinky-spit swear a solemn vow to likewise keep quiet.

Years later when I twisted that knee and felt a “pop” I went to the Doctor to have it checked out. He did x-rays (this was before MRI’s became commonplace. Like in the olden days) and asked me how long ago I had dislocated my knee. I said “yesterday I reckon” and he said “No, I meant originally. It never healed properly” to which I replied ***blink, blink***….so for the last 3 decades my knee randomly dislocates itself. Usually only happens every 2-3 years. I’ve since had it checked and the only thing that is ever recommended is physical therapy.

I never did tell my Mother. She’s in heaven now saying “Nah nah nee boo boo”….




Like ignoring your Mother’s warning of impending doom and disaster.












6 thoughts on “Whimper, Whine and Sob…

  1. Woman, I am looking exasperated, but I am speechless.

    No, wait, I thought of something.
    1. No more heavy jobs unless someone is home to rescue you.
    2. Why the hell didn’t your mother notice a dislocated knee?
    3. You should have deco’d the porch.

  2. Wow, here I am struggling along to recover and you’re going to usurp my right to complain?! I think it’s only fair that I get to whine about my neck, shoulders and back for awhile now. Crutching is SO NOT GOOD for the neck, shoulders and back! Phew, man am I glad I got that out!

    Seriously? Take it easy Grammy; baby that knee now (like you should have at 12!) and get your hunky husband to help you find that brace! I hope you feel better soon!

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