Things that made me go Hmmmm and WTF?? Even without the drugs….

Yahoo.com is a great place to find weird shit. I’m just sayin’….

As I’ve been home from work the last 2 days, lying in a prone position on ice packs because my back decided it hates me and has clearly been possessed by Satan, OR, I’ve swallowed an alien and it’s trying to claw its way out through my spine. Either way, I’ve thoughtfully compiled a list of my fav random articles for you….

Even in a crazy state of pain, I’m still thinking of my peeps….Geesh I’ma friggin’ Saint I tell ya…..🙂

Top 10 Crazy, Stupid, Tasty, or Otherwise Interestingly Random Stuff I Read Today That Aren’t Just Interesting Because I’m on Painkillers. 

1. Car that folds up like a Stroller. How convenient is this? I mean, even if you have to pay the $30 bucks for checking it at the airport, it’s still cheaper than renting a car when you get where you’re going, right?? Plus, you fold it up and take it in the mall with you and you’ll never again have to suffer the embarrassment of having to wander the parking lot looking for your car ‘cuz you can’t effin’ remember where you parked it. Genius…

How friggin' cute is this??? I have purses this would fit in!

2. Cool places to visit at night. This list will come in handy after the Zombie Apocolypse when the sun has burned out plunging the world into eternal darkness. Still gonna have pretty vacation destinations. Thoughtful, right?? 

3. OH. MY. GOD. SOMEONE. COOK. THIS. FOR. ME. RIGHT. NOW. Anyone who knows me knows I LOVE me some braised short ribs. And coffee. This is both and I want it in my face like right now. At 7:15 in the morning. And then later, for lunch. Mmmmmmm…..

4. This is why you NEVER tattoo someone’s name on your body. Unless it’s your kid’s name. Or “Mom”. Otherwise, like these celebs, you’re just gonna have to find a way to turn the name “Dominic” into a dragonfly. Or a very large hibiscus. Or a flying monkey….

5.Want to know the best tasting supermarket orange juice? The folks at Bon Appetit tasted all the icky ones, ruled them out and then made you a list of the yummy ones. Such givers….P.S. The Hubs favorite didn’t make the list. Go figure….

6. A peak inside celebrity kitchens. All I have to say about this is A) it reaffirms my statement that money does not buy taste in some cases and B) I want Gerard Butler even more now….

*Drool*...I die....

7. The Science of Microexpressions. I had no idea what the heck a microexpression was. Turns out it’s those split second facial tics that reveal how a person really feels. So, if you learn to correctly interpret those tics, you’ll know right away if your blind date Aunt Josephine tricked you into going out with is a serial killer. Or just wants to get close to you so he can sneak into your closet and sniff your shoes. A handy skill to have….

8. Home pet remedies gone wrong. This was actually pretty helpful as I had heard of some of these and had never tried them only because my dogs never needed them. However, they were stored in the back of my beady little noggin for future reference….The article also lists human foods that are bad for pets. Good article for doggie lovers….

9. 7 easy ways to mess up retirement. As I plan to retire sometime in the next few years, this headline definitely caught my eye. In a nutshell, it told me everything I’m doing toward preparing for my impending retirement is wrong…..FINE, so in order to do the traveling I dream of I’m gonna have to eat Ramen noodles and generic cat food. FINE.  I’m doing too little too late. FINE. I effin’ refuse to work until I’m 70. R.E.F.U.S.E…..

10. And this just proves Yahoo is a cruel, heartless bunch of bastards. Why? Because right after I read how I’ve already screwed up my dreams of traveling the world during a blissful retirement, the very next article I read was “America’s Best Brunch Locations”….that I won’t be able to travel to. Because I’ll be poor. And I love brunch. It’s my favorite meal…..That’s just mean, Yahoo, just plain mean. 

Now I’m depressed and in pain. I. IS. PITIFUL….

Plus, I’m bored, tired of sitting with this stupid ice pack, sick of dumb daytime TV and just  generally cranky.

😦

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14 thoughts on “Things that made me go Hmmmm and WTF?? Even without the drugs….

  1. Grammy, I have purses that car can fit into too! Probably why MY back hurts! lol! Not.giving.up.my.purse.

    Oh Gerard Butler. **swoon** Keep the kitchen, just give me HIM! But you like him too, so shall we share? I’m not stingy.

    Sorry your back hurts. Hope you’re up and about soon! ((hugs))

    • Your comment about the purses is probably more accurate than we know! I can’t function with a purse so small that I can’t hide Jimmy Hoffa in….why is that???

      • I should take some pictures of my purses and post them. Seriously, they are like over-night bags–actually one IS an over-night bag! But it’s LEOPARD! That makes ALL the difference! 🙂

        And Jimmy Hoffa is in MY purse…sshh don’t tell anyone. I plan on raffling him off one day.

      • A RAFFLE! That’s incredibly enterprising of you! Have you ever weighed your purse? I did once…sucker weighed like 14 lbs….explains so much.

  2. Hope your back gets better soon. Back pain is no fun. I know. My darling hubby put his back out over Christmas, and he could hardly move. He’s not a good patient and I’m not a good nurse… Hopefully it is better for good now. Fingers crossed. Lots of rest and ice packs for Grammy over the next few days!

    • Oh I.A.M. I’ve done nothing for the last 3 days but lay on icepacks. I’m kinda over it….every morning I wake up hopeful, and sometime about the middle of my shower I realize standing it a really, really bad idea. So I sit, except that hurts too. And then I give up and call my boss to let him know I’m staying home, AGAIN…..ugh.

  3. I hope your back is better today Grammy! As for the purse vs. back debate, I commute via train so I carry a backpack every day. Usually it’s not too bad, unless I’m toting the netbook. Weekends though I carry a tiny little bag that’s big enough to hold my phone, keys, license and various cards (debit, insurance, etc.). I got tired of the huge bags I carried when my kids were little and I love that I can slip it right into my backpack.

    • I tried carrying a small purse. I just end up trying to stuff the same amount of crap into it as I did the bigger ones. I reckon me and Pam will just have to continue to tote Mr Hoffa around…:)

  4. Oh, Grammy, I’m so sorry that nasty old alien is trying to claw his way out of your back. Booze kills aliens, you know. I’ve heard this said many times in my own brain. Proving that I have a brain, now that I think of it….but that’s beside the point. Kill the alien! Smash it into smithereens!

    What is a smithereen, anyway? Wait….gonna go google it.

    K, it means “small pieces, bits”.

    Smash it into nothingness! Stupid alien.

    Feel better soon. I heart you.

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