Lesson 2: Dealing with the Awwwwkward….

Awkward moments. Life’s full of them, ‘cuz God has a sense of humor….

I have totally done this....

So what do you do? Have a sense of humor of your own….I mean, ya gotta laugh at yourself right? You might as well, everyone else is!

  1. That moment in the car when you’re jamming and seat dancing, ya get stopped at the light and look over to see the dude in the car next to you laughing his arse off at ya….smile and wave. You’re totally busted so just go with it…

2.  We’ve all done it…”Oh when’s your baby due??” to the gal you haven’t seen in a while. The one who’s NOT pregnant….ok, just don’t. Don’t ever ask a fat woman when she’s due unless you know for a fact that’s not a food baby. Just don’t….no good can come of it…

3.  When you think you’re alone in the grocery aisle and just let a small fart slip. And then realize you’re no longer alone in the aisle. No one? It’s just me then?? Liars….

4.   Hubs says he’s busted people picking their noses at stop lights. He says he’s the buster and not the picker….Do we believe him?? Either way the picker can only grip the wheel with both hands, (ya know to prove his hands were nowhere near his nose) and pray “please let the light turn green, please let the light turn green!”

5.  Not really listening to the longwinded story that’s being forced upon you, and then realizing the storyteller has stopped talking and is, in fact, waiting for a response…fake it. Throw out some generic response like “oh man, I hear ya” or just make sympathic noises “Ahhhh, Hmmmmm, rightttttt….”

6.  Shouting out an enthusiastic greeting to a friend, waving frantically to get their attention, only to find that IT’S NOT WHO YOU THOUGHT IT WAS. Ignore, ignore, ignore. You were totally waving to that other person over there….and don’t make eye contact.

7.  The person you’re talking to has a booger trying to escape, and you can’t stop staring at it, and they realize you’re staring at it and keep rubbing their nose trying to discreetly get rid of it. This one’s a tuffy….I say just offer them a tissue. Your both already embarrassed anyway, might as well be practical.

8.  Walking in on someone in a public bathroom. Well first, shame on them for not locking the dang door. Just mumble a hasty “sorry” and walk away. Quickly. You don’t have to go that bad….

9.  The open fly. This one’s in two parts….A) if you’re the person who left the barndoor open and someone points it out, just go with it. Ask innocently “Oh, did I wear underwear today? Yes? Well thank goodness….” B) if you’re the person who noticed the unzipped fly, and feel compelled to comment on it, well really? Because you can’t help yourself? Then at least make light of it by saying “nice undies by the way”….personally, I ain’t saying nuthin’ they’ll figure it out eventually.

10.  That moment when you’re talking to someone you just met and realize you have nothing else to say. Nada. Mind is blank. And so is theirs….Whatever you do, do NOT resort to the fake laugh. Just excuse yourself to the restroom, and for God’s sake, knock before you go in!

‘Cuz we’ve all been there…

What’s been your most awkward moment??




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